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About Hobbyist Artist Member Hexa FleetFemale/Romania Recent Activity
Deviant for 2 Years
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Statistics 133 Deviations 199 Comments 1,719 Pageviews

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I try so hard not to try at all. I'm so good, so much better around people, around you, but they leave me alone, you leave me alone, and it all floods back because I start to think. I don't want to go home. Home does not exist anymore. I don't want to be left alone, stop leaving me alone. I never want to sleep again, please don't let me sleep again. Soundproof my room so I can play piano at 3 o'clock in the morning. Take me out for drinks and motorcycle rides. Take me to recording studios and throw me up on stage. Lock me in a white room with a bunch of paints and see what I can do. Take my hand and dare me to take you on the biggest adventure of your life, I promise I won't disappoint. I want to watch the stars, and stick my head out the window of a speeding car and scream, "ROCK N ROLL, EVERYBODY!"

Just don't leave me alone with my thoughts in this house full of insults and walls and chairs and plates and pillows that remind me of the pain of the past that infiltrates every moment of today.

Take me out. And never let me sleep again.
Never Let Me Sleep Again
Going through a crazy fit of wanting to escape everything by doing everything... I don't know how that works.
At 11PM, the day is not yet over. This is the time for spontaneity and the thrilling burn of shots trickling down your throat. In this dark hour before midnight, by pulling a hood over your head, you earn the mystique of anonymity, becoming a different person. The coolness of the night air wakes you up, revives you and, weary as your eyes may be, you begin to savor the scent of street food, the sting of freshly chopped onions lingering in the air. Returning home at 11PM is the premature ending of a story that could have seen new friends, lovers, tastes, and once-in-a-lifetime joyrides.

The day is far away. Tomorrow, you are untouchable. Go, now, and enjoy your 11PM. Another like it will never come.
I want to love you silently.
I want to love you calmly.
I don't want you to forget that I love you,
But I want it to surprise you when you find out
Just how much.
I want it to blow you away.
I want it to stun you.

I have been working on things.
Things you do not know of.
And one day, when it's all ready,
When they are all complete,
All projects perfected,
All debts paid,
All dreams made,
I want to blindfold you,
Gently take your hand and bring you with me,
Remove the blindfold,
And for you to gasp at what you see.

I want to create something
So undeniably amazing that
Not even the coldest heart could resist the urge to give in to it.

And your heart is not cold.

I want to make our wonderland.
Once, she saw
In the eyes of the acrobat
A glimmer of a smile.
A little laugh that said
The acrobat trusted her,
She was happy in that moment
And, sometimes,
If the acrobat abandoned her judgement
And stopped thinking too hard,
It could work.
And she,
Observing this smile,
Held it tight,
Hugged it,
Nurtured it,
Squeezed it into a diamond
And embedded it in her heart.
And she waited, patiently,
Sometimes silently crying,
Sometimes laughing out loud at the memories,
For the acrobat to come
And to dig
And to uncover
That diamond that shone bright
Just for her.
The Acrobat
Holding on to your diamond of a smile for safekeeping.
Wall Scream by never-going-back
Wall Scream
From a photo shoot I did for my good friend Caroline. You can find her tumblr here: or instagram @pseudogurl
Conceptualization, photography, editing and everything else done by Caroline! I kinda just stood there :P

This. Was. FUN. I love posing for pictures like this where I have to have a very dramatic facial expression, so obviously this was great. And I got a lot of strange looks from passers-by haha.
My mom is going away to South Korea for a few days, and she's taking her laptop with her, which is the only laptop in this family with VPN on it, so I won't be able to access my dA, Facebook, YouTube etc... nobody freak out, I will be back shortly!


never-going-back's Profile Picture
Hexa Fleet
Artist | Hobbyist

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GrimDreamArt Featured By Owner May 1, 2015  Professional Traditional Artist
Thanks so much for faving "Fantasy Castle II" :D
KittySib Featured By Owner Mar 11, 2015  Hobbyist General Artist
Thanks for the fave!:D
lady-of-the-quill Featured By Owner Oct 26, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
Hey :wave: thank you for the fave!
DamaiMikaz Featured By Owner May 29, 2014  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Thanks a lot for adding my work to your collection
DraganTheMighty Featured By Owner May 23, 2014
Thanks for the fav.
mexicanpedo Featured By Owner May 2, 2014
Thank you so much for the watch! :heart:
MarinaCoric Featured By Owner Apr 8, 2014  Professional
Thanks for watching! :wave:
straight-butch29 Featured By Owner Apr 3, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
Wait... you're from Romania? :excited: I've always wanted to travel there since I found out about your awesome Romanian pop music 2 years ago! 
never-going-back Featured By Owner Apr 3, 2014  Hobbyist
Hahahaha, yeah, but I live in China. And I don't really listen to Romanian pop music hahaha. I'm more of a rocker XD
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